Four years. A person can do a lot in four years. A college degree can be acquired, high school finished, a baby can go from not knowing how to walk or talk to running while singing an entire song. A new house can become a home, a family can grow, a business can thrive, and a lot of life can be lived. And a lot of life can be missed. There is so much that has happened in the four years since you have been gone, that at times is seems impossible that it’s only been that long. But then a song, a smell, a memory sneaks in and suddenly the loss of you is fresh but in those moments, I can feel you still and I am thankful.

The missing of you is a collective hurt, there’s so many people who loved you, but we all show the absence of you differently. London wrote this about you last year & I found it in his backpack one day.

Dear Drew, being your nephew has been a wonderful gift. I want to share all the reasons I’m thankful for you. One reason I’m thankful for you is he gave me the most awesomest hugs and he played with me. Another reason I’m thankful for you is he let me drink soda all day. Most importantly you loved me. Love London

He only had six short years with his uncle, I had five times the years with Drew by my side than London did and yet, he saw those short six years as a gift more than a loss and I think that’s a beautiful way to look at it. The memories that they shared together stayed with him and though his grief is different than mine, for how could it not be, he still feels Drew’s presence in his life and I hope he always does.

In his nine year old wisdom, I think he summed up a life well lived; your life, best; “most importantly you loved me” because at the end of the day, that’s all we ever want. For those that we love to love us back and you did. You loved the hell out of all of us and we will forever love you for it, today, tomorrow, for always.